Post-exam trauma
As I was walking out from my Anatomy bell-ringer exam, the one thought that came into my mind was, "Wow, I failed." I am still pretty sure that I failed...it would be a miracle for me to pass. I am thankful that I did very well in my midterm, and there is another 50% final for this course that I haven't written, so even if I did fail, it's still...Ok. Two years ago I would have cried about this, but 4 years of Life Sciences at U of T have trained me well. While I was walking home, I was telling myself that I won't blog about this. Afterall, who wants to expose their weaknesses to others? Who wants to tell people that they've failed an exam? After I got home, I decided to take a nap. It wasn't a very good idea afterall. I had pictures of MUSCLES in my dreams throughout my entire 1.5 hour nap. Can you imagine how scary this is? To dream about a random piece of muscle on a cut out limb? Euh....So...you must be wondering, why did I end up blogging about this? Well, after my nap, I read Day 35 of The Purpose Driven Life titled "God's power in your weakness". Great! Just what I need! I'm always amazed at God's timing.
-"Your weaknesses are not an accident. God deliberately allowed them in your life for the purpose of demonstrating his power through you."
-"Whenever you feel weak, God is reminding you to depend on him."
-"God wants you to have a Christlike ministry on earth. That means other people are going to find healing in your wounds. Your greatest life messages and your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts."
-"Humility is not putting yourself down or denying your strengths; rather, it is being honest about your weaknesses."
It's true that failing an exam in terms of a lifespan perspective is nothing big anyway. Ten years down the road this anatomy exam is not going to make me a bad OT. But what's important is that there may be more significant failures in my life that I have to face in the future, (especially in situations where I am under pressure and have to think on the spot...now you know one of my weaknesses). However, this doesn't stop God from using me. "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10. I am thankful that Jesus loves us just the way we are, and He doesn't call perfect people to serve and follow Him. If He does, no one will be qualified to do anything for Him.
posted by Growing Flower @ 12/02/2003 07:32:00 p.m.
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