Growing flower

May His love touch you this Easter!

Dear friends, thank you once again for all your comments and support. I would like to share this clip as an appreciation of your friendship. Every time I watch this clip, my tears just wouldn't stop coming down. Hope this short clip will touch your heart this Easter. =)

posted by Growing Flower @ 4/14/2006 05:21:00 p.m.

can I vent?

First of all, I want to say THANK YOU for all your comments! I really appreciate that you took your time to visit my blog and leave your precious thoughts. =) I feel loved!!

Now I need to vent...I really miss my Kingston support, and I miss the times when I can just go home, talk to my housemates/friends and feel better. Now I feel like I am "trapped", and I have no one to talk to. I am so sick of not being able to communicate with my parents properly. I am so sick of feeling that I am not listened to. I am so sick of being forced to make decisions that are not what I want. I am sick and tired of things being phrased in "Christian" or "Godly" terms when they want to use this authority to pressure me to do things. Why is it that everytime I want to say something, I am not listened to? Why is it that I am always wrong? Why is it that when I need understanding the most, I was told to do things in a certain way and "reflect"?

OK...I should stop...but thank you for reading/listening and putting up with my venting.

posted by Growing Flower @ 4/05/2006 11:19:00 p.m.

It's just a couch!

Last night I had a very weird dream. When I woke up I almost couldn't believe that it was just a dream. Normally I don't remember my dreams, but I remember this one because it was so different, so "weird".

In my dream, I was suffering from a disease and I "died". I remembered the last minutes of my life with my family, and I remember asking Jesus to take my life when I was dying. After I died, I went to this other place where I saw a lot of familiar faces. I "floated" around and saw many people that I had encountered throughout my life. This place is not the "heaven" that I have imagined it to be...in fact it looks very similar to this world right now. I can't remember the details of what happened next...but one thing I remembered very clearly...before I "died", I was very concerned about diaries that I asked a friend to burn all my diaries. I didn't want anyone to read my diaries, as if I have things to hide and don't want anyone in this world to know. In the dream I was in fear before I "died"...I didn't feel very peaceful as I imagined I would be.

That makes me wonder...am I ready to die right now? What if God takes my life tomorrow? Will I be ready to return to Him? Or will I be in fear because i have lots to hide and I haven't done enough for Him?

Recently I ran by a sign outside a church that says:"What on earth are you doing for Heaven's sake?" ...which leads me to my next point. Today at the Meeting House the sermon is about living a simple life. This society teaches us otherwise. It wants us to think that when we look at a nice couch, it's not JUST a couch, but it's a C-O-U-C-H, and we need a very nice, brand new one. It doesn't matter whether we have a couch already, but we would need a better one, a more comfortable one. At this point you may be completely confused by this couch analogy...if you want to know more, feel free to listen to this clip: http://www.themeetinghouse.ca/media/2006-03-26-489-sermon.mp3.

C.S. Lewis puts it this way: "If our charities do not at all pinch or hamper us, I should say they are too small. There ought to be things we should like to do and cannot do because our charities expenditure excludes them."

posted by Growing Flower @ 4/02/2006 12:42:00 p.m.